Mirrors

I've been thinking a lot about 'mirrors' lately. How thoughts and self-perceptions often manifest in our surroundings.
I've been thinking a lot about my mirrors lately, and know that there is strength - despite some chips in the glass.

I've been looking at those chips, and finding their source - in the 'not (fill in the blank) enough' side of my thinking.
I've been looking at the mirrors, and wondering how - a tiny chip can often hide the rest of the picture.

I've been looking at the results - the people and experiences - and know that some can only focus on the cracks
I've been looking at the others, the ones that see the picture - and think the cracks give the picture more character.

I've been wondering why there's such a split in my life - between those that see more or see less
Then I see the roots of their source, like a spreadsheet of my thoughts - and know where the gaps begin

Under the heading of friend, I rate myself high - never questioning my own give and take
Under the heading of student, I have always excelled - and have no doubt to my own strong ability

With the heading of child, of which sometimes I still am - I never feel quite good enough
With the heading of worker, no matter how hard I try - I still know that it hangs from a string

And the heading of partner, the one I most long for - I question my ability to be all that he needs.
And the heading of person, which I was given with birth - ties itself more to what I can do than to who I am.

Under the heading of strength, I come from strong stock - and can take any blow thrown my way
Under the heading of joy, I had little to mirror - a reflection I sometimes struggle to recognize.

The spreadsheet of my thoughts, lies out in the mirror of my life.
And I wonder, should I just break the mirror, or simply take a few more steps back.

A close up view, often distorts the image.